Are you constantly frustrated with those damn convictions, morals, and sense of right and wrong your parents imparted to you?

A recent survey found that over 80 percent of adults found that some acts or things they wanted to do felt "wrong" to them. Many people think it's because they have been raised the right way.

THE TRUTH IS FINALLY HERE -- AND IT CAN SET YOU FREE!

From the desk of Adam First:

I know that having morals can cause problems. Many people feel like they just can't do whatever the hell they want. Our scientists have been researching this reason for many years and recently achieved a breakthrough using specialized camera's that enable them to see Angels and Demons around people.

THERE ARE ANGELS AND DEMONS GUIDING YOU TO THE RIGHT AND WRONG PATHS AND DECISIONS!

Our researchers suspected there were certain chemicals in nature that we ingested through out the course of our lives that made us more receptive to either the Angels or the Demons! A long process of elimination ensued.

They started off looking at religions and seeing what 'hard core' religious people ate and drank. They filmed these groups of people at meals, at communion, and did it for all age groups. The damn Angels and Demons were just swarming around them during the entire filming process. One researcher claimed that, "It's like a swarm of bee's stinging and nagging the people. They are just everywhere." Another researcher said the worst part was, "The angel poop is just everywhere - if you could see it you would just be grossed out. Ever see your car after a flock of birds have been nesting over it for a month? Forget those microscopic bugs all over your body - the Angel Poop is worse."

The good news is that Demons don't seem to defecate on you. This is good because if we can find a way to repel the angels you will be much cleaner and also able to do whatever the hell you want!

Slightly grossed out our Researchers dove into the under belly of society hanging out at Willie Nelson concerts and interviewing people in prison. After a few good laughs and a couple gang rapes they determined that the under belly of society was capable of good behavior as well. And while the fun lasted all night - there was still no evidence that Angels and Demons were stronger or weaker in these people. Many of them just had a good run of bad luck.

Maybe the answer was in the animal world - considering animals were not born with the curse of original sin it's possible they secrete a substance that protects them from the influence of Angels and Demons. A long study of animals ensued (you can watch most of this footage on Animal Planet (they stole our films). You will notice that not one single Angel or Demon can be seen around the animals on animal planet so there was a definite breakthrough there.

So, our researchers started grinding up various higher level animals (monkeys, polar bears, etc...). They inserted the resulting fluid into Aerosol Cans and then went back to their first study group (the religious people).

After spraying them with the cans they were filmed again. To the researchers dismay there were absolutely zero Angels, but the Demons were everywhere. Suddenly we started seeing dead angels in our films - all over the bloody place. A few weeks later the film crew went back to see how things stood and there was much less angel feces lying around and with just one application a month of "ANGEL 'B' GONE" the religious group was free to rape, pillage, fornicate, and do all the other things they had never had the balls to do!

After the tests were done the religious group literally came begging to us for more. They said they had more fun and got more accomplished than they had in years. Here are some of their words:

"I finally killed that stinking son of a bitch next store with the damn radio! I love "Angel B Gone"!"

"It was so good to not have morals and feel for others. I finally did all those things I have always wanted to - my bitch of a wife won't mouth off to me again!"

"Sure I got 10 to 20 years but man - it was worth it!"

"Orgies are great! I should have tried them years ago!"

 

Let's face it -

Angel "B" Gone is now available through the internet only. At an affordable $27 dollars a can you just can't pass it up! Do those things you always wanted to now! Act now and will include an extra can - and our "KILLED AN ANGEL - so Fuck You!" bumper stickers!

HURRY SUPPLIES ARE LIMITED!